High Comedy Meets High Fantasy in a Best Selling Satire
The adventuring industry drives the economy of Arth, a world much like our own but with more magic and fewer vowels. On Arth, professional heroes are hired to slay fantastic creatures with magic weapons. The beasts’ treasure is hauled back to town and divided among investors.
A Fateful Decision
Since his career as a professional hero ended in failure decades ago, Gorm Ingerson’s life has been a cycle of petty crime, heavy drinking and avoiding the Heroes’ Guild. But when the Dwarf helps a Goblin secure its NPC documents, he quickly finds himself in the clutches of the guild’s enforcers.
A Deadly Quest
Guild justice means certain death for Gorm, but his captors present him with an alternative: to join a party of misfit adventurers on a quest to join a feeble priest with delusions of destiny. But the only clear thing about the work of the mad goddess is its danger: nobody has attempted to fulfill her prophecy and survived.
A Roll of the Dice
It will take all of Gorm’s Dwarven resolve to survive political intrigue, fundamentalist lizard men, purse kobolds, healing potion addicts, and worse. Yet even if he succeeds, it may not be enough to protect his party from the dark secret behind their quest.
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*****
An open letter to the people of the Freedlands:
By Fenrir Goldson
CEO, Goldson Baggs Group, Inc.
To the good people of the Freedlands,
For centuries, the city states of the Freedlands have enjoyed a historic degree of prosperity. Personal incomes, gross domestic product, and other key economic indicators have risen to new records. The average citizen of Andarun has more wealth than his father and his father’s father. In short, we are in a golden age.
This is due, in no small part, to the work of professional heroes. The Heroes’ Guild does more than keep our cities safe; their quests bring valuable treasure back into our economy. That loot is divided amongst investors, who reinvest these earnings back into local business. And of course, I have yet to mention the many services dedicated to professional heroes. Where would armorers, weaponsmiths, potion brewers, and insurance brokers be without the Heroes’ Guild? Make no mistake: professional heroes create jobs for the masses.
Recently, some malcontents have begun decrying our heroes and the valorous work they’re doing. They write slanderous letters to the town criers and stirring up trouble in the streets. Whether inspired by misguided pity for Shadowkin or jealousy for heroes’ treasure, their false words cause real harm. I, for one, will not stand by and let such malignant tripe go unanswered.
To the first point, let me just say that in my day heroes cut down Orcs, Goblins, and other Shadowkin on sight. Now Shadowkin often apply to become noncombatant paper carriers. Once they’re certified NPCs, these Gnolls, Kobolds, and more are allowed to live and work in polite society. Goldson Baggs has always applauded such progress, but one wonders when enough will be enough for these Shadowkin.
And yet, some fools claim that slain Orcs and Gnolls are somehow victims of the Guild. Today any Shadowkin with no criminal record and proper documents can be an NPC. With papers available to all, there’s no excuse for running afoul of the Heroes’ Guild. If Shadowkin obey the law, heroes cannot kill them. It’s as simple as that.
But I don’t believe altruistic concern for Kobolds makes the riffraff attack our heroes. Rather, it’s selfishness and greed that motivates them. The lazy envy the success of the industrious, and then invent injustices to excuse their poverty.
Don’t listen to their complaints. If the fortunes of myself and Mr. Baggs prove anything, it’s that there is opportunity in our economy. If the Freedlands are to remain safe and prosperous, we must continue to support the Heroes’ Guild and the businesses that support it.
Regards,
Fenrir Goldson
*****
About the Author:
Zachary Pike was once a basement-dwelling fantasy gamer, but over time he metamorphosed into a basement-dwelling fantasy writer. He has written and directed several award-winning shorts, including Zelig Award winner The Toll and Endurance Challenge: Mordred’s Isle starring Billy West.
Thanks for hosting Orconomics!
Happy to feature your book. Looks like a fun read too!